


Tripping

by buttercream



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Dragons, Drinking, Drinking so much that you end up tripping real high, M/M, Unicorns, drinking too much, i must also warn for kim jongdae
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-18
Updated: 2016-06-18
Packaged: 2018-07-15 17:49:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,992
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7232608
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/buttercream/pseuds/buttercream
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Baekhyun and Yixing end up at The Dimension Only Known By People Under The Effect of Illicit Substances.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Tripping

**Author's Note:**

> Saturday's fic! Idk what to say about this one. Only I'm rly sorry. This in unbetaed lol

It’s definitely Yixing’s fault. If he hadn’t convinced Baekhyun to get drunk they would never have started discussing occultism, thus, those dubious websites wouldn’t have been found. 

“It’s actually Luhan’s fault,” Yixing says. He’s a little wobbly, his hooded eyes indicating that his brain is still intoxicated. Perfect. “He was the one who wanted to look at that illuminati stuff…” A loud gasp, both of Yixing’s hands clasping on his cheeks. “Do you think Luhan realized we’re gone?”

Seriously. 

Baekhyun inhales, “Of course he realized we’re gone. We were swallowed by tHE FUCKING COMPUTER!!!!!!!!!!” 

The other shrinks slightly and has the decency of looking a little guilty. “I probably shouldn’t have clicked that link...”

Yes, a normal person would never google ‘baphomet + illuminati’ and click the link entitled “Learn how to activate the secret dimension only known by the highest-ranked illuminati priests!”. Baekhyun has married an idiot.

Finally having a chance to look around, Baekhyun inspects their surroundings. There’s snow everywhere, and woods, and seriously this looks like a recording location for Game of Thrones. Besides snow and trees, there’s nothing else in sight. Baekhyun inhales once more, closes his eyes, and counts to ten.

“Uh…” Yixing’s voice interrupts his relaxation moment. “Baby, shouldn’t we be looking for help? Or, I don’t know, another computer so we can get the fuck out of here?” 

Out of nowhere there’s a loud bang, and smoke starts to emerge from thin air. Blue smoke. From the blue smoke walks out a man. Baekhyun takes a double look. “Did you say get the fuck out of here?” asks the man. He’s short, and his mouth is somewhat kittenish, curling at the ends. Something tells Baekhyun not to trust him. “That’s the password!!!”

Yixing hums in confusion. Just for good measure, Baekhyun sneaks behind him. He has no clue who the hell is the Smoke Man, better not be too close. “What password?” Baekhyun’s husband asks.

“The password to get the fuck out of here, of course.” Smoke Man says as if they’re both stupid. “I am Jongdae and I will be your Dungeon Master.”

“What.”

Jongdae -- the Dungeon Master -- rolls his eyes and crosses his arms on his chest. “You said you wanted to get the fuck out of here, and I will help you get the fuck out of here.”

Baekhyun touches Yixing’s shoulders, half of his face hidden behind his husband’s head. “What is this place?”

Jongdae snorts, muttering unintelligible things before saying, “The Dimension Only Known By People Under The Effect of Illicit Substances, of course.”

“Wait a second,” Yixing, in all his drunken glory, walks right up Smoke Man’s face. “The website said this was an illuminati dimension!”

“Illuminati? What?” Jongdae puts a good distance between them and chuckles humorlessly. “Not really. You just need to be hammered to end up here.”

Yixing actually looks disappointed. “See, baby?” he turns around to face Baekhyun. “We shouldn’t trust what we read online.”

“So, you wanna get the fuck out of here or not?” the Dungeon Master seems to be losing his patience. 

“What should we do?” Baekhyun asks.

“Well, first you need to find the unicorn,” Jongdae says matter-of-factly. “It’s there in the woods, and it startles easily, so make sure you don’t scare it away. You only have one chance of capturing it. If you fail, you’re doomed to stay here forever.”

“Is that what happened to you?”

“Those little shits are really fast.” Jongdae pouts.

Choosing not to question the validity of a unicorn (they were ~swallowed~ by a computer, after all), Baekhyun asks, “After we capture the unicorn…?”

“You need to ride it. It will show you the way to the Dragon’s lair. There, you will steal one egg.” Jongdae yawns. “Seriously folks, you need to start bringing pen and paper. Halfway through this quest, you forget all the steps and I need to keep popping everywhere to remind you the stuff.”

“Isn’t that your job? You’re the Dungeon Master.” Yixing reminds him.

“Well, the Dungeon Master disappears mid-instruction, have you forgotten?”

“I’ve never seen that cartoon.”

Baekhyun gasps. “Has our marriage been a lie?” 

“I’m sorry!” his husband cries. “I promise I will watch everything!”

Yeah, he’s not gonna believe that. Baekhyun approaches Jongdae and points back at Yixing. “He promised me he would create a League of Legends account and I’m still waiting.”

Jongdae snorts, “They never create the damn game account.” clearing his throat, the Dungeon Master continues, “So, when you capture the egg, you’re supposed to crack it. Once you crack it, you’re out of here.”

“Ok, so unicorn, ride the unicorn, steal the egg. Got it.”

Jongdae waves them good luck and Yixing takes the lead, screaming to the wind about a pink unicorn he once dreamed of. Baekhyun considers never drinking again.

 

They find the unicorn. It’s, surprisingly, pink. Its horn is rainbow colored, but pastel rainbow and its tail follows the same pattern. The unicorn’s eyes are grey, and if Baekhyun’s eyes are not deceiving him, that marvellous mythical animal is glittering.

“It’s so beautiful,” Yixing amazes, and he seems entranced by the unicorn. His feet start to move. Baekhyun realizes Yixing is walking towards the unicorn. 

“Wait, don’t do that,” he whispers. “Don’t you remember what the guy said? They startle easily!”

“Unicorns like me, don’t worry,” Yixing says as if it’s a well-accepted truth. 

Baekhyun holds his breath as he watches his husband approach the horse-like animal. The unicorn doesn’t seem to have realized someone is that close, and Baekhyun feels his throat pulsing in anxiety. Then, Yixing lifts a hand to touch it. Baekhyun bites his knuckles.

The unicorn doesn’t even move when Yixing touches it. “Good girl,” he says. Baekhyun didn’t even know it was female. “Good girl. Yes, you’re a good girl. A pretty girl.”

His husband pets the unicorn’s hair, giving it’s neck a few gentle taps. The animal neighs. Yixing laughs, finally turning to look at Baekhyun. “Come, she’s nice.”

Baekhyun swallows, taking a few tentative steps towards the unicorn. She neighs again.

Yixing shushes her, “It’s ok, it’s Baekhyun. He’s a wonderful person. I love him very much.”

A surge of affection for his husband invades Baekhyun, and he smiles at the silly man petting a mythical animal that’s probably a figment of their imagination.

“Come now, baby,” Yixing tells him, and Baekhyun takes a few more steps. The unicorn remains silent, so he approaches her, sticking close to Yixing. “Now, we need to ride you. Will you let us ride you, pretty girl?”

Baekhyun blushes, his memory flashing images of one of their most recent nights together. “I feel really uncomfortable hearing you say that to a unicorn.”

Yixing laughs, facing Baekhyun. “Come on, she’ll let us ride.”

“Stop saying it.”

 

The Dragon’s lair is really a massive cave. Big enough to fit a dragon.

“Do you also have a mysterious ability to enchant dragons?” Baekhyun asks his husband just for good measure. Who knows.

“I’m not a Dragon Whisperer, sadly.” Yixing pouts, patting the unicorn’s neck. “Thank you for bringing us here, girl. You may go now.”

Neighing, the unicorn trots back into the woods, disappearing from their sight. Baekhyun watches the trail of glitter she left behind, and thinks he might actually keep that image in his mind.

“So, we need to steal a dragon’s egg,” Yixing says.

“You dickheads actually made it here.” Baekhyun screams. Jongdae, a sudden appearance by his side, snorts. “I’m surprised.”

“Dungeon Master!” Yixing exclaims. “Can we really go home after cracking the egg?”

“Oh yeah,” Jongdae shrugs. “You’ll be home very soon. Unless the dragon eats both of ‘ya.”

Shit. Baekhyun hugs Yixing’s arm. His husband caresses his hand. “Let’s just get the damn eggs.”

 

When Jongdae talked about a dragon, Baekhyun honestly imagined Smaug flying overhead, among the clouds, spitting fire and destroying villages. Or at least something Drogon-sized. He stares at the ~dragon~, tilting his head to check if he’s seeing clearly.

“This is a lizard.” Baekhyun states. 

“It’s a dragon, but it’s a small dragon,” Yixing crouches in front of the dragon, who menacingly coughs a pathetic poof of fire at him. Yixing smiles. “It’s cute! Look at it all dangerous trying to protect its lair.”

There’s something wrong with this whole situation. Baekhyun sees a dragon, a tiny dragon, and his husband bonding with it, but where are the eggs? 

“Uh…” he looks around. “Yixing, I don’t think this is the real dragon.”

“What are you talking about? It’s in front of us.”

“Where are the eggs, then?” the more he thinks about it, the more he believes it. A shiver runs down his spine, and Baekhyun pulls Yixing to his feet. “This is not the real drag--”

He never finishes the sentence. A deafening growl resonates from the far end of the cave, and the walls tremble. It’s suddenly warm, and it keeps getting hotter, as if… It is approaching them. 

Then he sees an _explosion_ tumbling towards them, yellow, red, and orange fire approaching at lightspeed. He doesn’t even need to see it to know _that’s the real dragon_. Baekhyun yells. “FUCK, RUN!”

The fire is too close, he can feel the flames licking at his calves, and he’s pretty sure he’s going to die. Baekhyun holds Yixing’s hand, knowing that at least he won’t die by himself. He runs, and even if he can see the light at the end of the cave, the fire gets to them first.

 

AND THEN THERE’S WATER ON HIS FACE. COLD. VERY MUCH WET WATER. Baekhyun wakes up with a jolt, gasping for air as he takes in his surroundings. It’s his house. Next to him in a similar situation is his husband.

“See, I told you the water would wake them up.” someone says; an oddly familiar voice. Baekhyun squints, looking at a face he shouldn’t know.

“DUNGEON MASTER!” Yixing yells, wiping water from his face and standing up -- wobbling, to be accurate. “YOU’RE REAL!”

“What is he talking about?” the man asks Luhan, who’s standing next to him.

“Xing, this is Jongdae. I told you he was coming. He’s a friend of mine.” Luhan tells Yixing as if Baekhyun’s husband was five years old. Then, the Chinese blonde looks at Jongdae, “He’s just drunk.”

“BAEKHYUN!” Yixing turns to him desperately, and Baekhyun doesn’t know what to say. That man standing next to Luhan is indeed the man who walked out of blue smoke in The Dimension Only Known By People Under The Effect of Illicit Substances. “TELL ME YOU REMEMBER!”

They were clearly suffering from hallucinations, but the weird part is… How did they trip together? Was it love? 

Baekhyun frowns, trying to stand up. He feels unusually fine after drinking so much. He helps Yixing up. “Let’s go get you some coffee.”

“Nice to meet you!” he hears Jongdae say as they walk to the kitchen.

Baekhyun sits Yixing by the counter, moving around to prepare the coffee.

“Was it real?” his husband asks after a few minutes in silence. “The unicorn and the dragon fire? I mean… Luhan’s friend, Jongdae? He was there.”

Placing a coffee mug in front of Yixing, Baekhyun leans with his forearms on the counter. “Baby, I think we tripped real high.”

Yixing’s face falls, “But the unicorn! I really liked her.”

“Aw, I know.” Baekhyun ruffles his hair, watching as Yixing sips his coffee. “I’ll get you a unicorn plushie first thing tomorrow. I’ll even make sure it’s pink.”

His husband grins, “Thanks.”

“Let’s try not to drink that much next time, ok?”

“We can find other ways to occupy our time,” Yixing shrugs. “I know that riding that unicorn brought back some memories--”

“Oh my god, Yixing!”

“Was it how I called her _pretty girl_?”

“Shut up!”

And that’s how Byun Baekhyun stopped drinking. He bought Yixing a pink unicorn plushie but made sure to hide the thing whenever they were having sex.


End file.
